"When you want to impress the neighbors with your modern solutions, but then become known as the guy who destroyed a Jeep at the push of a button."
2
"Got it delivered vertically..."
3
"I'm 5'4 with size 14 feet - not only am I short af but I gotta walk around looking like an L all day in hard to find shoes."
4
"Thought I bought forks."
5
"I traveled from UK all the way to Germany to take photos of the Devil’s Eye... but when I got there..."
6
"I'm starting to think this view isn't worth golfers aiming directly at our homes."
7
"Found out my neighbor sleeps with a loaded firearm today. (Corner of my computer desk right behind my monitor)"
8
"Saved 4 years to buy a BMW, 3-days later this piece of metal bounced on the highway into my headlight. Destroyed the headlight and the module. Dealership wants $2895 to fix it."
9
"Really? Someone gonna cut the grass right after it rains, and blow the grass on people's car?"
10
"I need a 3.00 GPA to keep my scholarship :)"
11
"It’s 3:00AM. Everyone’s asleep and I’ve been trying to get out of my room for 30 minutes."
12
"I knew those pancakes smelled weird."
13
"Got a smoking deal on this cable!"
14
"I ordered a karambit online... and this is what I got."
15
"My switch was stolen out of my luggage. Took the console and 7 physical games. This is all I have left. I hate Aero Mexico."
16
"Anyone else have to remove their washer agitator because they washed a new box of staples, or is it just me?"
17
"It's been on my finger for 22 years. Come home from a walk around the block to find the main diamond gone."
18
"Spent $40,000 renovating my new home. Just got the itemized budget, “Install Sliding Door Stopper: $100”. Here’s a photo of the “installed” door stopper."
19
"My wife got a tattoo yesterday about Down syndrome. Our 2 year old girl has Down syndrome and this was for her."
20
"Going bald at 14."
21
"My daughter took me roller skating yesterday for Mother’s Day."
22
"I’ll just do my makeup in the car like a stupid idiot."
23
"Yesterday my pen exploded in my dryer. Today, this when I get home after another 13 hour work day. Take a shot for me today please."