"I took away my son's electronics because he was being bad. So he went and grabbed my calculator and said 'Fine. I'll just play calculator instead'. He did this for a half an hour."
"He put this on his bedroom door."
"When i was a kid, i built a pot out of legos and planted a dead stick in it. For decoration."
"My nephews schedule for the week."
"Not one, but two students asked me today why I was wearing a 'KFC man' necklace..."